Child who grows in Frankness and Safety learns Justice and Trust. Importance of the own example and establishment of personal contact and confidential relations with the child were discussed on Saturday, 11.06.2011, in the Islamic Socially-Cultural Centre of Kiev by participants of the seminar for parents.
A parent himself must follow what he taughts
Opening the lecture about Islamic education of children, doctor Ismail Kady expressed his regret that the event was attended by fewer people than it was originally expected, - after all the topic is more than urgent.
He also emphasized that often parents happen to be demanding to their children in that what they themselves do not observe. Thus they do not impart to their children merits, but with their own example accustom them to hypocrisy admissibility that is completely forbidden. The child will not be convinced in compulsion of abstention from something and in necessity of execution of something if his parents, calling to that, do not embody in life their calls.
Raising a child begins even before his birth
The psychologist of the Kiev investigatory insulator, Natalia Kovalevskaya, stipulated that children with whom she works already passed through sad displays of lacks of educational methods of their parents, and it is easier and better not to admit that, than to correct the consequences. The child – she emphasized – is a personality from the first day of his life, and the way how parents will build contact and interaction with him from the first days of his life will directly affect the character of their further relations in the course of their life.
Therefore one should reflect on education of children not when they already reached the age of seven-ten years and a lot of possibilities are already missed – but before the child's birth. It is necessary to form the theoretical knowledge base beforehand, to check the received information, and when the child is born – consistently and purposefully to put this knowledge into practice, and not just then to begin feverishly and randomly search for something and set pedagogical experiments on the child.
Trust relationship are of the greatest importance to education of teenagers
Specializing on work with difficult teenagers and teenage problems, Yanina Omelchenko, psychologist, told the gathered about difficulties which the matured child face in the teenage period. Deterioration of his behavior and progress during this period is not the cause, but the consequence of this process. And how their parents will behave in this difficult period, becomes the defining factor of their further relations and degree of their credibility.
Parents need to set aim of preservation of trust of the child as a priority, that the child always knew that they will try to understand and support him, and also will help him to overcome difficult situations. That, when he will need help or answers to the important questions, he searched for them at his parents, instead of casual acquaintances, and would not try to solve the problem himself by all means, thus aggravating it more.
Madam Omelchenko discussed with the gathered the problem of protection of the child from negative influence of the surrounding society and how to explain to the child why a number of things, despite their popularity among contemporaries, are forbidden. She advised parents to learn to perceive their teenagers as adults, and to learn to communicate with him at the corresponding level. As a result the child trusts parents and discusses with them all questions exciting him, forming his own critical estimation of the phenomena and events which he faces, and makes the weighed choice, instead of fearing to be punished by parents. And this is the quality which is very much useful to him in his adult life, forming the complete personality and forming the internal core which will protect him from deformations under the influence of the environment.
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